It has been reported that across the USA on Halloween night there was a disturbing rash of trick or treaters accepting free candy and then returning to demand more free candy. Oddly enough, they were all wearing the same costume. If you have seen anyone who fits this description, you are advised…DO NOT give them any more candy!
*WARNING* Just to be clear, it’s not your candy! It’s the Government’s. Turn over all remaining candy to Obama so he can redistribute it as he pleases. Again, you worked and possibly even paid for the candy…but it is not yours! And Obama wants receipts. If you did not keep proper records of your candy consumption then you will be subject to an audit so as to make sure you did not eat candy that he wanted you to give to someone else. *WARNING*