Women are so discerning about their clothes, especially shoes so how could they possibly make a well informed decision about strappy sandals or slutty pumps without trying them on beforehand? And then I uncovered the secret….SPANX, no wait that’s a different secret…the secret to selling shit on the internet that you just “have to have” but aren’t sure you want for the rest of your life is…free shipping and a liberal return policy!
So I thought to myself, self,
“I wonder if they do the same thing with women?”
I had my crack research team (me) research the subject and lo and behold what did we discover? That I love naps. So after my nap I knew it was time to get motivated and drink several beers, which I did.
But the point is that research is overrated and I’m fairly positive that naps and beer aren’t…oh and I just ordered a Brazilian Supermodel…free shipping, liberal return policy.